Solution-Focused Hypnotherapy for Men’s Sexual Confidence and Intimacy
Hi - My name is Andy Selway-Woolley (he/him) and I’m a Clinical Solution Focused Hypnotherapist. I run HeadFirst Hypnotherapy, based in Upper Heyford (near Bicester), Oxfordshire and also work online nationally.
Sexual confidence is something many men quietly struggle with — and often feel too embarrassed to talk about. Whether it shows up as pressure to perform, difficulty staying present, worry about “getting it right,” or feeling disconnected from natural arousal, these experiences can have a real impact on self-esteem, relationships, and emotional wellbeing.
The truth is: you are far from alone and there is absolutely nothing to be ashamed of.
My role is to offer a safe, relaxed, non-judgemental space where you can ease the pressure, understand what’s happening in your mind and body, and explore ways of reconnecting with intimacy in a calmer, more confident way.
The Pressure Men Carry
Many men describe experiences such as:
worrying about how their body will respond
feeling “in their head” during intimacy
overthinking every sensation
feeling disconnected from pleasure
struggling to relax or stay present
pressure to perform “perfectly”
anxiety that builds before sex even begins
These emotional and psychological factors can create a cycle where the worry itself becomes the biggest barrier to enjoying sexual connection.
Solution-Focused Hypnotherapy offers a quiet, grounding space where you can ease that pressure and shift the focus toward comfort, confidence, and connection.
A Calm, Confidence-Led Approach
Solution-Focused Hypnotherapy combines:
positive, future-focused conversation
guided relaxation
mental rehearsal
supportive exploration of what “better” looks like for you
This approach isn’t about analysing your past or pathologising your experience. It’s about helping you move toward:
feeling calmer in your body
reducing the mental “noise” around sex
reconnecting with natural arousal
strengthening your mind–body awareness
improving sexual confidence and emotional closeness
Many men tell me they find it refreshing to talk openly with someone who understands the pressure men often feel around sex, performance, and expectations.
Intimacy, Arousal & Performance Pressure
When men feel anxious, stressed, or over-focused on performance, it can be harder to stay relaxed and connected during intimacy. You may notice tension, overthinking, or a sense of disconnect from your body’s natural rhythm.
Hypnotherapy offers a space to practise:
softening performance pressure
shifting from thinking to feeling
steadying your breathing
reconnecting with bodily sensations
imagining yourself calm and present in intimate moments
This helps many people feel more grounded and confident in the situations that matter to them.
Exploring Your Relationship with Sexual Habits
Some men come to me wanting to reflect on their relationship with sexual habits, including reliance on pornography or difficulty switching off fantasy when connecting with a partner.
In a solution-focused, non-judgemental space, we can explore:
what you’d like intimacy to feel like
what feels out of balance
how to build healthier, more meaningful sexual experiences
how your mind and body respond to stress or overstimulation
small, realistic steps toward the changes you want
This is always approached with compassion, respect, and care.
Why Men Often Prefer Talking to Another Man
Many men say they find it easier to discuss sexual confidence and intimacy with another man - someone who understands the pressure, the expectations, and the internal commentary that often comes with it.
My space is intentionally relaxed, open, and honest.
No awkwardness, no judgement — just real conversation and supportive, grounding work.
What Working Together Looks Like
In our sessions, we focus on:
what’s going well
what’s improving
what you want more of
how you would know things are changing
how you want to feel in intimate moments
building calm and connection
strengthening sexual confidence
And during the guided relaxation element, you have space to settle your mind, ease internal tension, and mentally rehearse feeling more grounded, connected, and confident.
Take the Next Step
If you’ve been feeling pressure, worry, or disconnection around sex or intimacy, you don’t have to carry that alone.
The Initial Consultation is a relaxed conversation where you can talk openly about what’s been going on and explore whether Solution-Focused Hypnotherapy feels right for you.
You’re welcome to join me in person in Upper Heyford (near Bicester) or online from anywhere in the UK.
Book Your Initial Consultation Here
You deserve to feel confident, connected, and fully yourself — in every part of your life.
Important Information
This page is for general information only and does not constitute medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment.
Solution-Focused Hypnotherapy is a complementary approach that supports emotional wellbeing but is not a substitute for medical or psychological care.
If you have concerns about your sexual health or bodily function, please consult your GP or a qualified medical professional.
Outcomes vary, and no specific results are guaranteed.
Find Out How Solution-Focused Hypnotherapy May Support Men Experiencing Sexual Confidence or Intimacy Challenges
Book your 60-Minute Initial Consultation today and start your journey towards better well-being
In-person at my Oxfordshire Therapy Room (Upper Heyford, near Bicester or Online via Zoom).
My name is Andy Selway-Woolley (he/him) and I am a fully qualified Clinical Solution Focused Hypnotherapist and Psychotherapist. I run HeadFirst Hypnotherapy®, based in Upper Heyford (near Bicester), Oxfordshire.
I assist people in regaining control of their lives by retraining their brains to overcome limiting thought patterns, master their emotions, and cultivate resilient behaviours for a brighter and more positive future.. I know… It’s awesome!
a nutshell, I ‘get you out of your own way’. Because, let’s face it, a lot of us are.
Solution Focused Hypnotherapy taps into the power of your subconscious mind so you can move forward towards the life you’ve always wanted to live. It’s a quick, practical way to address thought patterns, emotions and behaviours that are holding you back in life.
I’m a registered and accredited member of the Complementary & Natural Healthcare Council (CNHC), Association for Solution Focused Hypnotherapy (AfSFH) and National Council for Hypnotherapy (NCH).
I service the main towns and cities around Upper Heyford, including Bicester, Banbury, Oxford, Kidlington, Witney, Brackley, Charlbury, Northampton, Buckingham, Chipping Norton, Thame, Didcot, Abingdon, Henley-on-Thames, and Aylesbury, along with other local areas.
I also work nationally and offer remote hypnotherapy services online, so no matter where you're based, support is just a click away!